Motivation & Burn Out

I think I've realized why I've been so lazy the past couple of weekends: I'm burnt out. While I do love being by the ocean and I enjoy a lot of people out here, I think I'm pretty ready to head back home to go ol' Indiana. This is not easy to write, as I know that once I get back to Indiana I'll miss California. But at the same time, I know it's the truth. There are definitely things that would have benefited from my staying around home this summer, but I do think it was good in the end to have returned to LA. The honeymoon phase is over and I can see the flaws out here, all the reasons why I should not live here for more than 2-3 months at a time. (Even that is pushing it.)

I am excited for school to start up; I'm excited for cross country, classes, being a tour guide, tutoring, living with Amanda in what's going to be the most awesome apartment on campus, getting Knit Knite + Knitting for Nets up and running on the web, and a whole slew of other projects. I am going to be so incredibly busy and it's going to be great.

I know I should be taking advantage of the last couple weeks out here (there is a lot going on) but I can't bring myself to leave the comfort of my room or the pool unless someone else is with me. Motivation for running is at an all-time low. I don't feel like biking for the heck of it like I did earlier this summer. I don't even feel like going around taking photographs (instant clue that I'm not totally with it!). The novelty of Los Angeles has worn off, I think. It's a shame. Also, the weather hasn't been nearly that good this summer, and I think that's taken its toll on me. I'm also just ready to get back to Midwest air with Midwest prices and Midwest friends. Don't get me wrong; I really do like LA, but 1. not when I don't have a car 2. not for these long stretches of time and 3. not when it's cloudy for more than half the time I've been here. I will for sure come back and visit (there are too many friendships I've made here that I would hate to see end), but I don't think I'll live here for extended periods of time.

Who knows, that might change. And if it does, awesome. If it doesn't, awesome to that too. Life is unpredictable and I'm not wanting to let myself get stuck somewhere. I want to go around and see other parts of the country, too.

heading out

Woke up at 4am. I think I had just gotten to sleep, too, so that was sad haha. Left the house about 4.45 (perfect), got to the airport at 5.45, checked in -- they freakin' charged me to check a bag! WTF? I guess I have just avoided airlines that charge you to check ONE bag. That really made me mad. It's unfortunate that I cannot pack 3 months of life into a carry on. Screw you, United.

The security was really fun, actually. Usually it's my least favorite part (I always get searched somehow, and the people are generally in bad moods...), but today it was awesome. The people were so friendly! And considerate. Of course I got searched, or rather, my bag did, because I stuff it so full of cameras and other goodies that they can't see inside the bag. But I need all that :) Also, thank goodness by skateboard trucks got through. I was quite worried about those, honestly. Afraid they would be deemed a weapon or something...ugh. They're just my mode of transportation!

K, well, I'm going to bet O'Hare doesn't have free wireless like Indy (I love the Indianapolis Airport), so I probably won't have a real update till sometime later this afternoon, after I'm all settled back in at Karen's. I'll update my twitter via phone though, if you're interested.

indiana summer goodbye

Tomorrow morning I leave my hot & humid Indiana home for the warm and dry Los Angeles-area summer. As much as I love LA and all it brings (read: ocean), there are some things I'm really going to miss about my little town in Indiana, especially during the summer. This list is in no particular order, by the way...

o Thunderstorms: And rain in general. (I spent 3 months in ES/LA last summer and didn't see a drop of rain. I am not kidding.) But summer storms are one of my favorite things ever so going without them is pretty tough on me. (Admittedly, having 70 degree sunny perfect days every day is nice for event planning...but I do like rain too.)

o Stars: I can't see the stars very well from the condo I'll be living in. Also, going down to the beach at night to try to find some stars over the ocean is kind of scary. It really shouldn't be (ES is the safest city in LA county) but it still is. Active imagination and all. But looking at stars one of my favorite things to do regardless of season.

o My car: I love my car, or maybe it's just the fact that I *have* a car that I can get places with when I want/need to. Having to rely on LA public transport, or trying to get someone to drive me somewhere on their time, is not really my cup of tea. I also just adore driving, so I'm going to miss it an awful lot.

o Walmart: I am totally not kidding, and actually that makes me kind of sad. But Walmart is so incredibly convenient and cheap, and it seems like nothing in LA is either one of those things, that it would just be nice to have around. The closest Target to me is in MB and that is too far to walk or board to (it's nowhere near the beach, which would make it sooo easy) and I don't know about the busses there. 

o My family & friends: I miss them when I'm away, even if they're also away in other places.